Everything fades

I have been out of the country  for the last couple of weeks and have been unable to post my normal weekly post.  I normally post on Wednesdays, but wanted to change it for this week to remember my mom.  After this week, I should be back to my normal weekly art and poetry blog.

I wrote this poem a couple of nights before my mom died.  She died of cancer on January 14th, 2015.  Today would have been her 61st birthday.

The art work is called “Beyond the Curtain.”  It speaks to the mystery of what lies beyond the veil of death.


Everything fades

Everything fades
All is forgotten

Like yesterday’s footprints on the shore
washed away by the tide
as if they never were

Will I remember?
Will I remember how she smiled?
Will I remember how she loved and cared for me?
Will I remember the way she laughed?
Will I remember her generosity?

her compassion?
her hospitality?

Will I remember every line and every wrinkle?
Will the image remain etched in my mind?

lasting forever

never forgetting

Will I remember her last days?

the trials, the pain

the joy, the delight

Everything fades

like an erased chalkboard with only traces and echoes
of what once was
vague impressions of half memories half forgotten

my mind is not like the camera’s negative
always remembering every detail, never forgetting
always the same, picture perfect

My mind forgets, my memories fade
Good and bad, my memories fade

a mixed together mash of fragments
and fragments of fragments

and some things which have ceased to even be fragments

Will I remember?

Will I be able to tell my children and grandchildren of their grandmother?
She never met them
They never met her

She died too young, taken too soon

Will I be able to vividly paint the picture of who she was?

Or will I recall abstract lines and muted tones

Will I remember her stories?
Will I be able to tell them to my children?

What can I grasp
to hold firmly
that I might not forget

Like grasping the wind, a futile effort
Who can hold the wind?

I cannot remember

I cannot remember

What was the color of her hair?
What were the color of her eyes?

everything fades

time has no memory
it knows only the present

in time, all things are forgotten
everything is washed away

not even the strongest mountain can outlast time
it too will be forgotten

But why can I not remember?

I must remember
I must hold on
I must never forget

Not to remember only the good,
for she might be too highly exalted in my memory

Not to remember only the bad,
for she may be thought too poorly

No, I must remember both the good and the bad,
every detail

For it was both her good and her bad
which made her unique among people
and uniquely herself

it was these which made her, mom

my mom
and mom to many

But will I remember either good or bad?
How can I remember what even time forgets?

For in time, everything fades



Beyond the Curtainbehind the curtain

One Comment Add yours

  1. Jettie Winston says:

    Thank you, Christopher. I love and appreciate you. A wonderful tribute.

    Liked by 1 person

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